I won a prize at the party for my shoes. There is no confidence booster like winning a prize for Sexiest Shoes at the party, even if you know deep down it was rigged for you to win because everyone laughs to see a belly teetering in wedge heels.
Men competed for Oldest and Foulest Shoe (no, it was not Rocco, whew). All of us competed for Shoes that Have Seen the Most Miles (China). It was a fun ice breaker even though most of us knew each other.
I met a new face at the party. Not many people knew we were pregnant, so I felt like the belle of the ball with my belly. Poor new gal happened to be in my circle long enough to have to hear me accept congratulations over and over. This new gal told me she has three children. She is a trained nurse, but currently not working.
You know, she says, I really wanted to be at home with my children.
Isn't that just soooooooo nice for you, thought Bitter Infertile Roccie, constantly jealous of every family story she hears that sounds like a fairy tale to her.
I do a good job hiding my bitterness. I made some jokes to new gal why she had to endure such revelry around my pregnancy. Had she known me that last two years, she would have been corned with my Fertility War battle stories. She would have known not to get trapped with me at a party unless she wanted to know all the details of my uterus and constant pursuit of pregnancy.
The Fertile shakes of her wolf clothing. She has four retrievals, two cancelled retrievals and more FET than I can remember under her belt. Sadly, she also has several miscarriages in the whole process. She is clearly healed and lively when she shares her story.
I tell her I love her and ask her if she would like to be my best friend forever and ever.
What a great way to make a new friend. I look forward to the day when I can talk about all this crap with a smile on my face.
ReplyDeletethose sandels are hot! where did u get them? how great that you had a sort of 'coming out' party w/ your belly. congrats :-) and how great that you being open about your trials and tribulations helped you to make a new friend, or at least a friendly "fertile" acquaintance :-)
ReplyDeleteThose sandals are awesome! But all I can think when I see them is, how on earth did you manage to buckle them with The Belly in the way?
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you found a new friend too. I love finding other people who get it, but at my age it's really rare.
Decent fertile indeed. Love your work Roccie, you and your shoes are fabulous.
ReplyDeleteI want to reach through the computer and then create a time machine so I could be at that party with you to give that decent fertile a big hug.
I hope she accepted your offer to be her best friend for ever and ever. xxx
ah, the infertile are everywhere.
ReplyDeletewhere is our next picture of this 'belly' you speak of?
She better have said HELLS YEAH! or she is missing out on an awesome new best friend! I think perhaps you won the prize because of your totally fiiiine ankles, shown off so nicely by those strappy sandals!
ReplyDeleteI'm sure she will be your new BFF, sadly I may have to fight her for it, if we ever get to IL.
ReplyDeleteIt'a amazing isn't it? How when you are up front about your story you find out there are so many others who have also struggled with infertility that you may have never known you share that connection with. I've found this multiple times throughout my pregnancy with Ian. I was like you very open about our struggles and I was shocked to find out how may of my co-workers had also been through ART or were still in their journey to conceive. It's made me much closer to some of them because of this shared connection and also allowed us to be there for each other in a way we wouldn't have before knowing that background.
ReplyDeleteThere is just something so special about meeting an IFer in real life huh? So glad for you Roccie. I hope your meeting was the start of a beautiful friendship.
ReplyDeleteOh that sneaky Infertile in Fertile clothing!! They are hiding everywhere! But isn't great when they come out!
ReplyDeleteAre you rocking some "Lincoln Park After Dark" on those piggies of yours? Super adorable shoes and super adorable you. If that Infertile doesn't want to be your best friend forever, sign me up. ;) We need some more bellay pictures of your bellay...without the file folders in front of it.
ReplyDeleteTHat's why I love when I'm able to just be open about all the IVF stuff. You find out that lots of people are in our situation. They just hide behind expectations.
ReplyDeleteI think I'm one of those women that "looks" fertile with my two kids and expanding belly. You can't see the stillbirth, the miscarriages, the failed IVFs...
ReplyDeleteOf course anyone who knows me knows ALL about all of that ;)
So glad that she was so open with you. I always try to share my infertility journey when talking about my pregnancy. You never know the other person's story.
ReplyDeleteYou've got lovely feet and those are awfully nice shoes. Speaking of shoes, you just never ever know what sort of shoes someone else has had to walk in ... I'm surprised all the time.
ReplyDelete:)
ReplyDeleteLovely feet. A reward well-earned.
It's interesting how many people appear unscarred on the surface. Like it all came easy. And then you scratch it, and you see. And (selfishly, on my part) it's a relief not to feel alone.