Rocco and I talked about babies a million years ago, before we got on the IF train ride through the jungle. We agreed that we would welcome a baby if s/he had Down Syndrome. Of course we would.
Then it became a very real chance of becoming a part of our lives.
What had we signed up for.
Hours, days, google searches, board binging, blog binging. I walked with the families who have a member with Down Syndrome.
I am ashamed to admit I was afraid of what I would find. How it would make me feel.
My last post did not represent coming to terms with Down Syndrome. I made it look easy. Cut and dry. Simple. It wasn't that easy. There were a lot of big scary rocks I had to look under. Heart surgeries. OPEN heart surgeries. It was terrifying.
These families put it all in perspective. Law love the internet. I was able to read about diagnoses, both before and at birth. Parents took it in stride, parents reeled, parents processed. It was magnificent to see family after family arrive at the same place. One of my favorite bloggers tags her posts on the bulletin board with facts about all three of her kids - left handed, curly haired, and T21. Fact, fact, fact.
Not "normal" chromosomes. Typical.
No Trisomy 18.
No Down Syndrome.
I like the teaching on the typical. I do sometimes think while having children that have typical development is a relief from pre- and during pregnancy fears and concerns, it is also easy to appreciate how adorable babies and children and adults with Down Syndrome are. Having experienced the pull away that happens with teen hood I can imagine how grateful I would be that the hugs and sweetness stay long after the exchanges become more rare from my older kids. Not surprised at your maturity or love in this post. It is who you are!
ReplyDeleteI am relieved that your results were "typical" - however much a child with a disability is loved and however much joy they bring, knowing that your child will not be risking some of the really scary stuff that comes with it must be a weight off your mind. My mother worked with children, then adults with disabilities - including some with DS - and I have an enormous admiration for the families who love and care for them. I also feel very privileged that I got to find out at an early age that these are children and adults who *happen* to have a disability - their disability does not define them - they have as much individuality and personality as any of us. I also think you handled your possible diagnosis with great good sense - information (especially first hand) is power.
ReplyDeleteYour baby is so lucky. Having you as mama means anything is possible no matter what facts combine to make him or her. Now I hope the rest of your pregnancy is as close to blissful as someone with our histories can have!
ReplyDeleteBeautiful post. Does this mean you received the testing results?
ReplyDeleteI'm happy to read this. Typical is good. I think it is so great that you were researched and ready no matter which way things were to turn. On the fun side, did you find out if it's a she or he baby?
ReplyDeleteMuch love to you. Beautiful post. You've got yourself one lucky baby to have you as parents. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteSending your birthday wishes right back to their rightful owner. Hope you're having a day as lovely as you! xo
ReplyDeleteWell said. I appreciate the way Silver expressed it. Your love would never falter, but you won't have to see your child go through certain challenges that would be hard for a mama's heart. You'll just watch him or her go through other challenges instead...
ReplyDeleteJust found your blog and look forward to following. Sending you my very best wishes.
ReplyDeleteI love how thoughtful you are around the very important matters related to family building, and how you always come back to the same conclusion: family is family: love is love.
ReplyDeleteYou inspire me all the time, dear woman.