- Fail to load the dishwasher properly. Everyone knows that large mixing bowls on the bottom will prevent proper cleaning of the top rack.
- Attempt to feed me a chicken pot pie for dinner. Again.
- Host a membership drive for NPR.
- Add another anniversary to remember my losses on October 15.
- Crash an application and cause me to lose my work. Shitballs, why didn’t I save it more often.
- Experience a bad hair day.
- Lure me into car driver vs. bicyclist screamfest on the street. I can’t act like I don’t hear your argument and not get involved. I just wish I hadn’t used that language with Toddlerina in the backseat. And in my own suburb.
I am in the stage where I cannot get riled up right now. This is most difficult for me. A lot of you are in this place too, so how do we do it?
I learned a simple trick from my wonderful acupuncturist how to counter moments like these. The opposite of this negative energy is laughter. Release it with a good laugh – at yourself or at the Universe for such a lame attempt to thwart you. Think, “Really? You thought this would bother me? Puh-lease.”
She also told me to shift into receiving mode. Look for ways that folks give to you – even your dogs. “I receive this opportunity to bond with you while I clean the mud from your mitts.”
If someone opens the door for me, I give them a thank you that probably almost sounds like a come on.
My donor starts her stims today. If she is in receiving mode she would know I think about her constantly and send her all my very best.
I completed the medication order a couple days ago. The agent from the pharmacy was getting off the phone with me and planned to call my donor next. The agent asked the routine question, “Is there anything else I can do for you?”
“Yes. There is. Please be kind to my donor. Leave her in a better mood than you found her. “
She laughed but I think she probably did it.
I can't believe how quickly it's all moving. Awesome. Fingers crossed and prayers being said...
ReplyDeleteUgh, on Lupron it would take stuff a little as a sideways glance or not signaling while driving to send me off the deep end. Awful, toxic stuff.
ReplyDeleteBrava for having an escape plan from the insanity. I love the receiving mantra. I had one with our dog as well: "I receive this opportunity to bond with you wile I remove and discard the dead mouse from your mouth"... "I receive this moment to pass out from horror and finally get some sleep." lol.
Seriously though...that's great advice. I am crossing everything for you! Your donor is getting super good, positive juju from ya. We send allllll the good juju we can muster your way, too!
The Lupron ride really sucks but I'm so happy to hear that your Donor is starting the stimms!! I am keeping everything crossed for you girl - EVERYTHING!
ReplyDeleteI literally LOL'd at the "NPR membership drive" because ours annoyed me this week, too. . . . and I don't even have Lupron as an excuse. ;-)
ReplyDeleteSounds like you are full steam ahead. I'm excited for you!
Glad to hear your managing the side-effects, and even better that things are moving along.
ReplyDeleteGoed luck!
lupron is one big nastay bitch. she left me with raging headaches and the worst mood ever. sending you great vibes and also to your donor as she starts her meds. hang in there!! xoxo.
ReplyDeletebtw, i think if i were you, i'd be tempted to stalk my donor and beat the crap out of anyone who pissed her off during the stimming process. like, really. so i totally love the comment you gave to the lady at the pharmacy :o)
ReplyDeleteHey Loverface, that was a really sweet thing to say to the pharmacist about your donor. I knew you had it in you! ;) Oh boy, I am crossing all my things to cross that she has a nice, big, healthy batch o'eggs for you! I can't believe you're already shooting your self up. Craaaaaazy! Loads of love, lady!
ReplyDeleteI love your acupuncturist's tip. That really clicked for me and I need to start practicing some of that. (Sometimes, I have very, very bad attitude...and once you're in that frame, it's amazing how much $hit rains down).
ReplyDeleteThis is not only happening, it is imminent. I'm so glad, Roccie. Come on, universe. Give, so that we may receive!!!
In my mind, Roccie, your hair is always beautiful. And so is your voice. Those are the two features I see most clearly. So when you have a bad hair day, just remember that somewhere very real (my brain), your hair is always beautiful.
ReplyDeleteYour acupunturist sounds like a total gem. I like what she says about laughter. Think about it as Lupron Laugh (to the tune of Neutron Dance from the Pointer Sisters).
To you, dear friend, and to this blessed donor, I send a little metta (lovingkindness):
May you be free of fear and protected from harm
May you be healed and fully experience your wholeness
May you have ease of well being
May you be happy and at peace
Hoping for all the best for your family and your donor. Now off for a good laugh!
ReplyDeleteThis is a wonderful post. So much of what goes on in our heads is about how we react to things, and if you're able to open yourself up to receive things in a positive way it can really change your whole perception of what's going on. It can make you kinder as well.
ReplyDelete(I suck at this.)
Hang on, hang on! Lupron sucks crapass but there's a baby at the end. I thought about my donor every single day and hoped she was dealing with the drugs better than I was.
ReplyDeleteHell, you don't need Lupron to find those things intolerable! There's something really magical about the two of you (you and Donor) doing your separate things to create this child. Makes me sniffle! I am sending my best quality good thoughts (they're worth their weight in gold, I promise) out to you both.
ReplyDeleteLove the laughter, love receiving mode, and *adore* your love for your donor. Keep it comin'.
ReplyDeleteYou crack me up. Every time. I do wish I could have had you over for the MadMen finale and we could have toasted our impending success with fabulously concocted mocktails.
ReplyDeleteAHHH! Lupron is a terrible ugly bitch and I hate her. Glad to see that you can keep your sense of humor about it. Good luck with this cycle. Glad I found you out here in bloggerland.
ReplyDeleteI LOVE the idea of you just randomly breaking into a hearty laugh. And I'm going to try it myself too, I guess we've all tried every other medicine so may as well add Laughter to the medicine cabinet too.
ReplyDeleteAwww and my heart twanged when I read what you said to your pharmacist about leaving your donor in a better mood than you found her... you are a sweet lady. Seriously awesome.
x
Roccie, I am a fan.
ReplyDeleteThinking of you and your beautiful donor!
Like S, I am not injecting Lupron but my npr station was having a pledge drive and it bothered the shit out of me too.
ReplyDeleteHang in there Roccie, it is well worth it. Take deep breaths and yes, laugh.
You can do this cuz your a rock star, woman!
YOu are so close, hang in there. The drugs are f*cked up!
ReplyDeleteroccie....
ReplyDeletehad to come check out your blog after such a smart, helpful post on BB2Gether.
I know it's awful, this lupron. when i did it my fertility doctor told me that i was about to embark on "his best arguement for hormone replacement therapy".... (in menopause now...NOWHERE near as BAD!). i get all the awful little moments....but one night, in a restaurant with friends, my husband said something to me; can't remember what, but...i screamed at him FUCK YOU!. in the restaurant. my friends were appalled but supportive, my husband not so much. so, i picked up the steak knife on the table, turned to him, with it raised, and...well, thank god, burst into tears and didn't kill him!.
yessir, that lupron is a BITCH!
I am having a day like that myself. Actually a string of days like that.
ReplyDeleteYour last paragraph made me cry a little. No I'm not hormonal, not at all.
xxx
I think it would be completely fair and reasonable for the rest of the world to stop or at least have a legal limit on annoyances while anyone is on Lupron.
ReplyDeleteAt least you had the wherewithal to say what you said to the drugs lady. That is way more than I can muster when hormonally charged.
lupron is a b*tch. But see, even in the midst of all that, you manage to reach out to try to make your donor's day better, via the pharm lady. Really nice. I bet she probably did it too.
ReplyDeleteMo
It's amazing how much of an effect Lupron has. I like your acupuncturist's approach - laughter is good wherever you can get it.
ReplyDeleteHappy to be cycle sisters with you -- good luck!