I am crying with you Roccie. Saying a prayer you navigate these waters and are able to feel some peace one day. What a selfless incredible women you are.
You have my prayers, love, and thoughts that you will continue to recover and find joy and peace with having given your embryos a shot at being born in a wonderful family.
It is good that your children, Rocco, and you will get to see their baby pictures, and other pictures as they grow up, because of the newly and better defined openness of the recipient family.
It is good, kind, and generous that you are giving what you already know are some awesome genetics to help a precious young girl have a little brother or sister, and for her Mom and Dad to get to share their love with some more children.
I like the update on your last bullet . . . it may be a lie too that you are "stable", because you have too big a heart, and have had too intense of a ride to plateau so quickly, and not continue to have those tears fall. In between moments of clarity and logic of course.
You are a great mother! Prayers for you, Rocco, Leah, and Jay, the recipient family, and the children to be.
Sending hugs and prayers!! You did what all amazing moms do...what's best for their babies...and sometimes that hurts. Know in your heart you did what was best for them...you are giving them a chance...your smile will come back!
You are amazingly strong. Reading your posts over the last several weeks has made me weirdly glad that I don't have any frosties (which isn't something I feel a whole lot of gladness about typically. Which is an understatement.) I don't think our family, or I, am in a place where more kids make sense but I don't know how I could have the courage and strength to give the gift you have. I would probably simply have been immobilized by an inability to make a decision and follow through with it. You are very brave, and you are giving such joy (and life) to another family. In fact, you are actually likely creating a family (hopefully).
Amazing.
I hope that time will prove your decision to have been the right one, that your connection with the recipients gives you solace and some measure of happiness in the joy they will likely receive, and your beautiful family reminds you every day of how blessed you are - despite it coming with some very tough moments.
OH MY GOD, sorry for the endless repeating comment! It wouldn't show up and I so wanted you to know my heart was with you! I was coming back to try one more time...
I'm so sorry I didn't have a chance to comment as you were going through this heartwrenching time. You made the right decision and did everything you should have to get to this place. As with all the shit we've faced, this will get easier with time. (right??) But i'm so sorry it has to be so hard. Hugs to ya, lady.
Honey, I have to apologize for not getting a comment on here when you needed it. My phone doesn't like to let me comment on blogspot blogs, but that's a shitty excuse. I'm so sorry the pain was feeling so fresh and overwhelming and I wish I'd reached out. I love you. You've done a beautiful, difficult, and amazing thing.
Abiding with you, Roccie. {{{{HUGS}}}}
ReplyDeleteSending my love to you, Roccie. Many, many hugs.
ReplyDeleteSending you a big, big virtual hug.
ReplyDeleteSending hugs & love. I wish this didn't hurt you so.
ReplyDeleteI'm sending you lots of love. You truly are a selfless person. I can imagine this is so incredibly difficult. Xoxo
ReplyDeletesending you a hug!
ReplyDeletexoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo You are amazing. Big big hugs...
ReplyDeleteMuch love to you Roccie
ReplyDeleteMuch love to you Roccie
ReplyDeleteI am crying with you Roccie. Saying a prayer you navigate these waters and are able to feel some peace one day. What a selfless incredible women you are.
ReplyDeleteKelley
I allow myself a day of tears. No more than that. Otherwise, I know I won't be able to pull myself out of my sadness. Sending you hugs.
ReplyDeleteYou have my prayers, love, and thoughts that you will continue to recover and find joy and peace with having given your embryos a shot at being born in a wonderful family.
ReplyDeleteIt is good that your children, Rocco, and you will get to see their baby pictures, and other pictures as they grow up, because of the newly and better defined openness of the recipient family.
It is good, kind, and generous that you are giving what you already know are some awesome genetics to help a precious young girl have a little brother or sister, and for her Mom and Dad to get to share their love with some more children.
I like the update on your last bullet . . . it may be a lie too that you are "stable", because you have too big a heart, and have had too intense of a ride to plateau so quickly, and not continue to have those tears fall. In between moments of clarity and logic of course.
You are a great mother! Prayers for you, Rocco, Leah, and Jay, the recipient family, and the children to be.
Many, many hugs! You have done an amazing thing.
ReplyDeleteXOXOXOXO
ReplyDeleteSending hugs and prayers!! You did what all amazing moms do...what's best for their babies...and sometimes that hurts. Know in your heart you did what was best for them...you are giving them a chance...your smile will come back!
ReplyDeleteOh sweetie. I'm thinking of you and sending you a virtual hug. Much love to you always, my friend, but especially now in this difficult time. xoxo
ReplyDeleteI feel terrible for having missed this. Praying for you!
ReplyDeleteYou are amazingly strong. Reading your posts over the last several weeks has made me weirdly glad that I don't have any frosties (which isn't something I feel a whole lot of gladness about typically. Which is an understatement.) I don't think our family, or I, am in a place where more kids make sense but I don't know how I could have the courage and strength to give the gift you have. I would probably simply have been immobilized by an inability to make a decision and follow through with it. You are very brave, and you are giving such joy (and life) to another family. In fact, you are actually likely creating a family (hopefully).
ReplyDeleteAmazing.
I hope that time will prove your decision to have been the right one, that your connection with the recipients gives you solace and some measure of happiness in the joy they will likely receive, and your beautiful family reminds you every day of how blessed you are - despite it coming with some very tough moments.
If I knew you personally I'd be hugging you hard.
Elizabeth
Sending you a big squishy one!!! You rock.
ReplyDeleteJust stopping by to say 'Hi'. Hope you are hanging in there. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteLove and prayers being sent your way!!!
ReplyDeleteYou've got 'em, you amazing woman. This is an incredible gift of love.
DeleteYou've got them, you amazing woman. This is an incredible gift of love.
ReplyDeleteYou've got em, you amazing woman. This is an incredible gift of love.
ReplyDeleteYou've got 'em, you amazing woman. This is an incredible gift of love.
ReplyDeleteOH MY GOD, sorry for the endless repeating comment! It wouldn't show up and I so wanted you to know my heart was with you! I was coming back to try one more time...
DeleteSorry I missed this. But can I add a dollop of kindness on top of the mountain you've got going on above? In time this will feel right, all right.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry I didn't have a chance to comment as you were going through this heartwrenching time. You made the right decision and did everything you should have to get to this place. As with all the shit we've faced, this will get easier with time. (right??) But i'm so sorry it has to be so hard. Hugs to ya, lady.
ReplyDeleteHoney, I have to apologize for not getting a comment on here when you needed it. My phone doesn't like to let me comment on blogspot blogs, but that's a shitty excuse. I'm so sorry the pain was feeling so fresh and overwhelming and I wish I'd reached out. I love you. You've done a beautiful, difficult, and amazing thing.
ReplyDelete