Thursday, May 26, 2011

More bleeding for my last days of T1

The subchorionic hemorrhage returned on my last two days of the first trimester.  

Just to remind me that I am never really safe, I am never really in control, and I am never certain of a damn thing.  That is why we call them Take Home Babies.  They are not christened so until you get to take them home.

If I believed in tempting fate, I would really kick myself for the title of my last post.  Over confident fool.

I am an over confident fool, but not a foolish fool.  I knew when I saw the blood the first day in the toilet it was nothing to panic over.  (Ok, there was mild panic.)  It has been so long since I saw it in the toilet, not just on the tp.  Then the next day - there it is.  You feel it, don't you?  Forfuckssakethatwasnturinethatjustpassedwasit.  A second day of blood in the toilet, so I called the OB.

I should explain that it was brown.  I think the first day might have been more reddish brown, but perhaps it was the shock of seeing it there swimming in my toilet.  I fully expected the soothing nurse to listen, ask questions, reassure me and tell me "of course it is no bother - you call us any time you have a concern".  I hung up and the office called me back in less than five minutes to tell me to come into the office.

I had a very bad experience with the OB.  You might remember her evil, hateful self from the last time she made me consider leaving this OB practice.  Doesn't that just boil your blood?

The Evil OB was dismissive and short tempered.  The best way to sum it up is she saw me as a fanatic worrier who wasted her time, her precious time.  Please recall, the office told me to come in, not the other way around.  She treated me like a housewife with a spider in her kitchen.

Here are some key comments I think you will enjoy:
  • "I don't know."
  • "Women have been bleeding since the dawn of time."
  • "Women bleed and many can go on to have healthy babies."
  • Editor's note:  do you like that, "many" and "can"?  Bitch.

The Evil OB told me everything was fine.



What the fuck the does FINE mean?

She was as heartless as they come.  

I have had a speculum.  Haven't we all?  She made it feel like an umbrella was opening my body.  The real kicker?  I saw the heartbeat a good 20 seconds before Evil OB bothered to point it out to me.  It felt like 20 years and I will never, ever forgive her for it.

I have a follow up appointment scheduled with the Caring OB to get some real answers.

I am 13 weeks today and the longest first trimester of my life is over.


  1. Yay for t2. So sorry you continue to have scares and that stupid SCH. Can I just say I hate that OB too. So glad everything is ok.

  2. UGH...that OB sounds awful!!! You MUST get a new OB, it's ridiculous she said those things to you and treated you that way. You deserve far better care than that! So sorry the damn SCH has to show her ugly face again. One step at a time my friend, standing beside you sending love & hope ((hugs))

  3. Give me this OB's name and address. I'm sending hate mail.


    <3 u.

  4. That ob sucks bleepedy bleep bleep. So sorry she did not give you the reassurance that you deserve. I'm so glad you are in the big 2T

  5. Please assure us that you will speak to someone in the office about Evil OB and her lack of bedside manner and humanity. And ask that you never, ever have an appointment with her again. You deserve so much better, especially in these times of need for reassurance and empathy.

    Fingers crossed that all resolves and stays calm.

  6. I don't know which re-tell is making me angrier: the one with Toddlerina, then in utero, or this one, but together they piss me off. You can't be the only one this heartless wonder with an MD after her name is hurting. It will be interesting to hear what Caring OB says about it. Also, No insight offered from her rudeness, despite less than one week passing from "resolved" to "it's back", just "Fine." Really? Did she go to medical school on an island with really nice weather and disinterested faculty members? (No offense to other medical professionals who did go this route that don't act like this bitch.) This is the kind of thing that turns you into a crusader. I mean if she is that mean to you, conveys no medical advice, and misuses the speculum, well, the venom coming out of her inconsiderate skull needs to be stopped.

    You certainly deserve only caring nurse, caring OB, just like your good-hearted RE!

    Congratulations on 2T beginning! Continued, re-jumpstarted prayers for re-resolving of damn sch.

  7. What a bitch. Seriously, you do need to call the office and take care of some biz. That's horrible bedside manner and she shouldn't be treating or talking to patients that way. I would also like her address because I'm going to pay her punkass a visit. Remember, I can get there faster than the mail can. Loads and loads of love going out to you and The Little Baby That Could in the 2nd trimester. ((((♥))))

  8. Ugh, Rocc. Life is too short to pay assholes to make you feel lousy. Get Dr. Caring on the case right away. So sorry you're having to deal with this. xoxo

  9. Second tri, yay!

    Do you have an email address for this psychobitch? Because even the best spam filters can't deal with the inundation of nasty porn sites I can sign her up for. (My "lovely" anonymous commenters can attest to that by now, I'm sure!) Bedrest has left me with nothing better to do with my time, if you're interested.

  10. I think if there's any way to get a different OB you should. Anyone who is dismissive of a scared pregnant woman shouldn't be an OB. Pregnancy is a scary time and while most of the time, things go well,,,, sometimes they don't. And just in case a worry is a sign of something real, an OB should always treat them seriously.

    That said, I'm not trying to scare you. I hope and pray that all goes well for you and your little one. But my experience has taught me that you should be vigilant during pregnancy. So don't let this experience keep you from going back to see a doctor whenever you are worried. Just try and see a different one next time.

  11. I hear you! I thought I was safe at 16 weeks. We told everyone, I even came out on Facebook and here I am on bed rest 17 weeks pregnant with a complete placenta previa praying every day this is a take home baby! You are in my thoughts always!!!!

  12. I hate that you have to deal with the SCH and such an evil OB. :(

  13. there's nothing like celebrating the end of T1 than with a little bleed. f*ck, that's awful. can i please go with you to your next dr's appt, so that i can put that shitty doctor in her place for you? what an asshole ... did you just sit there in stunned silence? ugh ... can you avoid dr evil and only see caring OB going forward?? i hope so :o) xoxo.

  14. I applaud you for only panicking a little! How cool is that! But I'm sorry you had any cause for panic at all. I am holding out hope that things will be perfectly smooth from this point on. Why not? It could happen! And yes, that OB clearly hates pregnant women. It's time for her to change careers, and perhaps you can help her with that by KICKING HER ASS.

  15. Oh man I hate bleeding while pregnant, even if you know why and it's only a little it's still scary. In regards to the Evil OB I would wait till after you have the wonderful healthy take home baby and then write a letter to the head of the dept. You might think it won't make a difference but it does and can result in her stupid ass getting fired! I've seen it happen as you are probably not the only one.

  16. Damn. I'm sorry for the dramatic entrance into the second trimester. Can you not see that OB anymore? I switched practices for less than that...

  17. That OB sounds like she needs a proctologist to remove the carrot that is stuck up her butt. Isn't a good bedside manner a requirement when you deal with pregnant women? Apparently not. You handled it well, Roccie. And glad you have a follow-up with the good doctor. WELCOME TO T2!!

  18. Thinking of you as always. Hoping you get the answers you deserve from Caring OB.

  19. What a BIOTCH of an OB!! My knuckles are white...this ride sucks! But sooo relieved to read that a steady, HEALTHY hb was detected. And welcome to T2!

  20. fuck her and her evil umbrella speculum. Oh she makes me so angry. I wish a whole group of your bloggy groupies could be in the room next time she scans you (hopefully this never happens and that she drops dead suddenly today)so we could all give her a piece of our minds. Heartless cruel bitch.
    But absolutely lovely to hear baby is ok and heartbeat was flickering away perfectly.

  21. Oh dammit. FFS really. First off, damn these stupid SCHs and their "here today, gone tomorrow, back the next day" routines. ARGH! (Did I mention dr. saw something at my u/s today, that "could be" a different hematoma? Really? Seriously? ARGH!)

    But more importantly, I am SO SORRY you have to deal with that disaster of an OB. I swear, the only saving grace through the terror that has been this pregnancy has been that my perinatologist is the sweetest, kindest, most caring, helpful, thorough doctor I've ever had the opportunity to work with. I feel so lucky. I think your doctor's office could benefit from you clearly explaining why she has been such a dreadful doctor to see. And cc your insurance company (or the supervising hospital? I don't exactly know how other offices operate, since I am part of the Kaiser mega-medicine conglomerate.) She needs a serious refresher in bedside manner.

    And wtf is it with SCHs that decide to bleed on the last few days of T1? I had my big bleed on 12 weeks and 6 days. Landed in ER the day I was finally starting to feel like maybe, just maybe, things might be okay with this pregnancy.

    Hoping Dr. Caring has some reassuring information for you at your next appointment, and that this is the end of the bleeding and the beginning of some smooth sailing through T2 and T3 into Take Home Baby Land.


  22. That OB is such a cow. I can't believe this is happening to you, Roccie! Enough already Universe - leave this poor woman alone!

    Seriously... I am thinking of you sister... and I am hoping like hell you'll get not only the answers you deserve at the next OB appt, but some freaking compassion for what you're going through as well!

  23. Sorry to hear you've had another scare, hoping it's no more than that.

    And the episode at the OB, very upsetting.

  24. Oh mate, your support should not be a worse experience than the event. Im so sorry this is how you are treated. When I lost my last bub, I was told that it was 'normal'... um no, its not, its not NORMAL to lose a baby!

    I just want to thank you for your ongoing support, even though you are going through so much yourself. It is truly valued...

    And welcome to Tri 2, the best of the 3....xo

  25. Ugh, sorry for the last parting blow of your first trimester, but look! Here you are in your second, with a great heartbeat!

    Drop Evil OB - life is too short to waste on people like that. (And if you're feeling ornery, file a complaint.)

    Hoping the good OB gives you what you need. *hugs*

  26. Dude...that OB is still practicing? Ugh.

    I hope the next two trimesters are far less eventful for you :)


  27. I really know. I know what it's like to see that bleeding and wonder how you'll make it through another week. But you will. And I believe you'll make it through all the weeks to that THB.

    Please find an OB who deserves you as a patient.

  28. I have no idea how so many terrible people become OBs. What a bitch.

    I am so happy to hear you are 'fine' although i will be waiting for the real details to come. Sending lots of good thoughts your way for an easy last two trimesters to your take home baby.


  29. Okay, now I understand fully just how evil Evil OB is. She's a real fucker. And I hope that you don't have to deal with her, ever again, that you can always get in to see Glenda. (Really, it's the least the universe could do).

    And, "Women have been bleeding since the dawn of time?" Really? I'm thinking of a word. It rhymes with grunt.